I am just wondering,have you ever walked up to a complete stranger, man or woman and gave them a compliment? The post the other day about President Trump and the First Lady complimenting Frances First Lady is still on my mind. So many people thought it was creepy, insulting,etc. I think I just must beat a different drum when it comes to my attitude about some things.

Back in the 80's, my friend and I were standing outside the Theater in the Festival Center here in Mobile, waiting for the show to let out so we could go into the Theater. As I was standing there looking around ( I am a people watcher, I notice people), I saw this woman standing there with her friends also waiting to go into the Theater. I would estimate that she was in her later 60's to early 70's. The way that the sun was hitting her hair and her face she was just breathtakingly beautiful. I walked up to her, tapped her on the shoulder, and told her "I just wanted to tell you that you are beautiful". She was a tall woman, she looked down at me, said "thank you" and I saw that her shoulders went a little higher and her head was a little higher as I walked away. I was in my 40's then and had no idea what impact my compliment to her would have on her. Now that I am in my 70's, I understand that I made her day with that compliment. I was thinking when I get into my 60's or 70's I want to be as elegant as that lady.

The way that people treat you (as a woman) changes with age. When you are in your 40's the compliments flow like a river. Then 50's-60's, you start to notice that people will look in your face then turn away with out saying anything to you. Then when you get into your 70's-80's, you become invisible to the general public. People will see you, turn their heads the other way to avoid eye contact and avoid speaking to you or even acknowledging your very existence.

There is another incidence that I have never forgotten (memory like an elephant) and my first experience with being treated differently. Maybe 10 or so years ago, my friend and I went to Red Lobster for dinner. The hostess took us over to a booth to sit down and there was a large table of Black people sitting to our left. As we were waiting for our food to come, one of the Black men at the table starting making remarks. At first I did not realize that he was talking about us. My friend wears 2 hearing aids and with the back ground noise she could not hear what he was saying. He was making fun of our hair styles and the way we were dressed, laughing and pointing at us. He said very loudly " talk about stepping back to the 80's"., one of the ladies sitting at the table next to him kept trying to get him to shut up and to quit making fun of us.. Sitting there, I looked down at my dress, hmm. I really did not think it looked as old as it was and I did not think my hairstyle was a 80's hairstyle. The funny thing about it was the dress that I had on I actually bought from Gayfers in the 80's. It was a plus size dress, at the time I wore at size 12, but I loved the print so much I bought it. It was huge on me and still is and I still wear it. LOL. The other funny thing is that, the dress that I had on at the 55th high school reunion dinner in April of this year is that very same dress. And the Red jacket that I wore to the 50th high school reunion dinner in April 2012 is the same jacket that I had on with that dress at the Red Lobster... black evening dresses plus size
It did not make me feel bad because I dress for me, I wear what I like and I really down care if anyone else likes it or not. I only have to please me. But it did bring to my attention, life has changed and the way others see us as we age has changed. There is no kindness, no compassion for the elderly or the poor. I just thought it was sad and I was relieved that my friend could not hear what he was saying because she was so sensitive to people, it would have just crushed her. She dresses very nice and always looks elegant.

I say, if you see a man or a woman, no matter what age they are and they are just striking beautiful, tell them. Make their day because compliments are hard to come by. People rarely even look up from their phones to even acknowledge their own family members no less the general public. Spread some kindness in this cruel cruel world.